We are starting off where we left off with Shelby in the woods, with a man scalped clean and Lady Gaga cackling behind Kathy Bates. Oh yea. I am digging Gaga's look this year.
I understand and ENJOY when we get to see a crossed path from a previous season. We are still calling this a MINI SERIES per the Emmy's; but I am starting to seriously doubt this. I saw something on Facebook that showed a lot of similarities in our main character:
Anywho, Shelby runs away after all the Pig Talking and runs into her husband in the middle of the road and he drives her to the hospital. She didn't make this all up because they drug tested her. Is she in the same hospital bed she was in during Freak Show?
We are reversing roles as Matt wants to leave but Shelby now wants to stay and teach them good ol' boys a lesson.
Checking in on Lee, she still has some custody issues. Her beautiful daughter and her American Girl Doll have come for a visit. Her ex, Mason has dropped her off and Flora makes a great observation about how Lee told her it was a farm house and yet, there are no chickens or goats. While Flora and Lee play jacks on the floor, Lee turns away for a second only to discover that Flora is under the stairs crawl space, talking to her imaginary friend Priscilla. Oh you know Priscilla, the one that is tired of all the blood, so if Flora helps her, she will make her a bonnet. No worries, a second later, some flowers crash to the ground a bonnet is there for Lee to pick up. Lucky Day? I think not....
Matt and Shelby discuss selling the house. They decide to sleep on it, so whilst sleeping, they hear Piggy Man again. They run out of the house, in the dark and chase the noise. Of course, they get separated. Some wild pigs run by, running, and running and we are still running and then Shelby and Matt meet up just in time to sit around the camp fire. It's a clamping-Pinterest-Inspired set up with a pig head on the top, and some beautiful fresh cuts of meat dangling above an open flame. Pretty sure that's human meat, but whatevs.
Back at the house, Matt and Shelby attempt sleep again but the darn phone keeps ringing. Matt runs to answer the house phone. Now, last week he had wireless security systems that was watched via his app on his iPhone. Now we are back to a landline?
He answers the phone, some woman is yelling and begging for help. Matt looks down to see that that phone isn't even plugged in.
Matt is a little freaked out, and as he turns, he gets to see the nurses that Shelby saw last week. They are special. They kill a little lady in front of us. She is famous but I can't seem to place her name....anywho, the shot her in the head and Matt thinks this is all a dream. He heads out to get the cop sleeping his car and once a sweep of the house is done, nothing is to be found.
Lee's ex is here to get Flora. She is playing a quick game of Hide & Seek and they have an easy find, she is back in the attic crawl space. The GOOD news that Flora has is "they are going to kill us all" but they are saving Flora for last. Since they are good friends.
Before you write Priscilla + Flora = 4 EVA on your binder, Mason is not going to be bringing Flora back to this place ever again. Oh, and he is calling the Judge to let him know that Lee is probably still on the wagon and doesn't need to be around the little girl. Lee goes and gets my box wine a drink and gets white girl wasted. When she wakes, there are some knives she put in the ceiling. #partytrick
I am taking a break to say this season is already beating me down. Since my favorite seasons are 1,3 and 5...obviously any even numbered season won't be my jive. We already into episode 2 and I am just hoo hummm. I have heard others say it's refreshing and new but goodness, is it? IS IT? We are repeating a lot of stuff.
I mean, even down to Flora's warning, it reminds me of S1, E1:
While Lee takes a sleepy, Matt & Shelby look out the window to see a little girl in old clothes standing in the yard. Oh joy, visitors!
They discover where the girl was standing a cellar of sorts, of course you go in. They discover a dusty old place, that has, surprisingly, a TV with no dust and a 1985 home recorder. Time to watch some home movies. It's a movie with Elizabeth Taylor Dr. Elias Cunningham. Dennis O'Hare how the mighty have fallen. You were beautiful last season and now you need a shave. Today is October 11, 1997. (google says nothing major happened) and this is the Dr.'s last testament so he is going to make it a good one.
He is making a true crime book a la Helter Skelter (you are no Vincent Bugliosi sir) about KILLER! LESBIAN! SISTERS! NURSES! No better line has ever been said on tv. Ever.
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Killer! Lesbian! Sister! Nurses? |
In 1998 Miranda and Bridget worked at a nursing facility, killing old people when they were about to be discovered, they decided to open their own place. What to guess where? Yup, the farm house. The tortured and killed old people (hard to watch some of this) and they loved to do in the order of their first initial:
M U R D E _
So they never finished that last letter. (ROGER)
When the house went up for sale, the people painted and painted the walls where they wrote out the unfinished MURDER word (Manson. Helter Skelter. Get it) but the words kept appearing. So now, Matt runs to the wall, peals the wallpaper off and there are the words. Sorry folks, it's real. This is the same house!
Matt and Shelby have aligned their horoscopes and both want out of the house. They have the lawyer real estate agent lawyer come over and tell him he did them wrong not telling them the history. Of course, this reminds us of Season 1? No?
To wrap this all up, Lee went and kidnapped Flora (Shelby calmly calls the ex and explains that Lee is crazy and made a mistake and Lee looks like she could kill Shelby) and she loses Flora her within minutes. Again. Probably best that Mason calls that Judge.
We see Flora's yellow hoodie at the top of the flagpole tree. Reallyyyyyyyy high up there!
That is the end of this episode. I know it was long, trust me, I know!
Are you enjoying the new season? I mean, I am happy it's back. It is for sure one of my favorite TV hour's of the week. It's not my favorite season, I knew that from the first 3 minutes, just like I knew last year it would be a huge favorite. There is a lot of scary, jumpy parts and I enjoy that. I think Ryan Murphy always try to cram as much of the story in as he can and then he wraps it up just as messy at the end. So we will see where this is going soon.